I’m 43. Having illnesses as a child that impacted my family’s holidays, gatherings, celebrations etc., I have always felt like I was/am a burden on people. Most saddening, that I am a burden on the people I love the most. The people I only want to bring love, life and beautiful moments to. People tell […]
BE GOOD TO YOU
Don’t get down on yourself today.
Give yourself a little give today.
You don’t have to master anything today.
You don’t even have to try today.
It’s okay to feel like you can’t go on today.
You know what? Today might just not be your day.
We all have those days.
I’ve had a seriously shitty five fucking years now. And most days I try to find at least one thing I’m grateful for.
Gratitude helps me remember hope.
If gratitude’s not your thing, try to find whatever your thing is.
I know what it feels like to think finding hope is impossible, but it’s worth trying because hope is, I-can’t-go-on’s kryptonite.
Hope is, today’s-not-your-day’s kryptonite.
And when you have hope, you have hope for better days than today.
And hope of better days conjures up excitement and curiosity.
And that excitement and curiosity provokes thoughts of what experiences lay ahead in new days, in better days, in days where open possibility lay.
That’s the juice, right there. That’s the stuff that helps it not be such a bad thing for today to not be your day.
DO NOT GET ME WRONG HERE!
I am not suggesting for one second that finding hope on your bad days means you’re not in the current shit storm you’re in.
I’m not selling some form of recycled bullshit optimism, here. Or any new forms of bullshit optimism.
Not that I have anything against optimism. I’m a destructive optimist myself.
Unfortunately, the world tells us that nothing is out of reach if we just have a positive/optimistic attitude. And I’m calling bullshit on that.
Heaven forbid we let anyone see that our life sucks a bag, now and then.
There’s this feeling that you’ll be outcasted. Thrown from the tribe of humanity, if you’re not shitting rainbows every fucking day.
If you only served the kids baked beans for dinner and rather than feeling guilty, you found it soothingly
hilarious that their classmates were going to suffer the consequences the next day.
Or if you dare to enter the realm of self-love/hate … if you admit when you look in the mirror you don’t like what you see or you DO like what you see (you can’t win with that one!)
I don’t want people to feel bad for not feeling good. I see it everywhere. And it makes me sad.
So if today isn’t your day. That’s okay.
You’re not failing.
Don’t get down on yourself.
(If it helps and it’s consensual, maybe let someone else get down on you today?)
In all seriousness, if today wasn’t your day, if you shat a regular shit that didn’t look anything the fuck like a rainbow.
If this isn’t your moment. You’re not failing.
If today isn’t your day. You’re not failing.
If this week isn’t your week. You’re not failing.
If the past six years haven’t been your years. You’re not failing.
If you feel it’s never going to end. I wish I could tell you it will end, but I can’t. What I can tell you is that I completely understand you, I know what that feels like. I feel it on the regular.
The thing I wish the most for you, though, is that you find what reminds you of hope. Because then you just might feel a little better about those days/weeks/months/years, that just aren’t yours.
Be good to you.