SHALLOW by Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper 2nd try Two things happened today: I watched A Star is Born for the first time. And I my chronic invisible illness decided to flare. I’m currently in so much physical pain, every joint feels like it’ll never work again, it’s agony on my feet to walk to […]
So I Did This Ballet Thing
So yesterday I was doing my usual VERY limited ballet/physio routine, basically just tendus: one to front, one to side, one to back – then repeat on the other side. But I added some developpe-ish moves to the end of my session.
I happened to be recording that ballet/physio session, and when I looked back at the video I was so happy because I’d just done something that I thought would take years to be able to do.
(video is at bottom of post)
And when I think about uploading the video to share my celebration with others, I get an all too familiar interruption to my joy. Because, unfortunately, there is a huge disparity between the amount of people who understand chronic pain and the amount of people who, despite having zero understanding of chronic pain, feel that they know what people with chronic pain should and should not do and they need to share their based-on-nothing opinions with people who have chronic pain.
But here’s the thing, chronic pain sufferers have lived with pain for a long time. Hence the word chronic. And when you have something chronically, you learn to adapt.
So I’ve learned to do things in spite of my pain.
The kind of comments I will get after doing those extra movements, for instance, will be:
“You must be in less pain to be able to do that?”
“I thought you were in pain?”
“It’s good to see your pain has gone away.”
And then later that might or the next day, if I’m feeling pain FROM ANYTHING, those people like to pop out one of an assortment of these crackers:
“Well, what did you expect when you did that extreme move earlier?”
“Well, you’ve learned your lesson now, haven’t you?”
“I suppose you won’t be doing that again, will you?”
And all that crap ruins the moment for me.
So listen up dudes — all I want to do is celebrate the fact that, IN SPITE OF MY PAIN, I just pulled off a movement that I didn’t think I’d be able to do for years.
So please, come on guys. Come and celebrate with me!
*note: I actually didn’t experience any pain from doing my developpe-ish moves.
*note 2.0: I did get a shitload of pain from showering and getting dressed today, though.
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See ya later, beautifuls,